backyard crowing

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------'s the beginning of a story

Written Dec. 20, 2004
t. s. eliot
who is this guy?
June In December
April May June

I have endured several Mr. Wrongs. My mother would say I was through with men completely. She’s a real charm. A divorced mother of one, she sings “I’m Going to Wash That Man Right Outta My Hair” in the shower. My female parent is a man hater, much like my newfound self. Now we have something in common, I suppose.
First there was Gary Bickett. A twenty-one-year old who had just finished his hitch in the army, Gary was built. Most girls fawned over him because of his iron hard muscles and tan body, but that didn’t attract me much. Infact, he didn’t attract me much, and perhaps that’s why he wanted me. I was a challenge. After he coaxed me into a date I realized maybe military men were smarter than I thought. He read—and not just comic books. We would spend hours in the bookstore discussing anything from Chaucer to Harry Potter. Gary’s mother was a self-titled “authorette”, or writer of chick fiction. This lady frenchified everything—she majored in French and her great great great great grandparents were one-fourth French. I remember now the day she discovered her ancestry—she was searching the internet and voila unseen Bickett family website. Gary’s mother was nothing like mine. She seemed to keep everything she ever bought or received, her husband died in a car accident, she was an old hippie and she did not shelter her son. Although she hated that Gary joined up, she hugged a tree and went on. Fortunately for her, this particular Mr. Wrong never went to war. To make an already long story short, I caught him necking with some blonde at a Knicks game that neither of us knew each other would be at. Halftime had never been so entertaining.
Gary was nothing compared to his dentist, Dr. David Townshend. David was good in bed, and “a real looker,” as my aunt would say. He had piercing green eyes and dark, constantly disheveled hair. The man danced well, too—I attended a few dinner parties at his side and felt rather grand strutting about in dresses and his deceased mother’s mink. David was an only child like me, and he felt that the mink should be kept in the family—but nobody in the family ever had occasions to use it. So, I borrowed the thing from time to time when I was out with him. He was English and spoke with an amazingly attractive accent. When his mother died, he was a year away from completing secondary school in England. His father saw that a drastic change of scene was necessary for them both and so rashly moved to the States. Since he was quite the scholar in his new American high school, David decided to stay in the US to go to university, and he graduated from Stanford. The European school system certainly turns out smarter lads than the American one does. When I dated him, David was still very new to his trade. He had just become a dentist and was trying to prove himself. I met David when I was with Gary and searching for a good dentist. I found out that my former dentist was charging me much more than what was fair, and so ranted the experience to my boyfriend over the phone. He calmed me down a bit and informed me of this great dentist that he had—Dr. Townshend, a cool young English guy. When I shook his hand, I was sold. Gary’s Dr. Townshend was extremely professional, and awfully good-looking. He towered over me and got close to my face as he spoke with me. I’ve come to believe that maybe this is because he was English. I’ve been told that other cultures have very small personal bubbles when compared to Americans. Maybe David’s personal bubble just never inflated when he expatriated. Anyhow, I didn’t mind being inches away from my dentist’s face. At first it was a little uncomfortable, but of course it evolved into something insanely comfortable. I never cheated on Gary, though—he was the one with the blonde. After the Knicks incident I knew David would be the next man of my life, as long as he wanted to be. He didn’t know Gary had recommended me to him, so I didn’t see a reason to tell him so. I was able to ensure that Gary and I never had back to back appointments, so we would never need to see each other again. If you live in New York, you almost never bump into people you’d rather avoid. That is the beauty of big cities. I was really hoping David would be a keeper—I lived with him for eight months and traveled to England for Christmas one year to meet his relatives. Just when I thought he might commit, I made a startling discovery, of all places, beneath our bed. He was at work that morning, and I had the day off. I was conscientiously vacuuming under the bed and came upon a few magazines with pictures of men inside that I might find nice, but I never knew he found them nice as well. When he came home that evening I had set the gay porn out on our coffee table next to Good Housekeeping and Vogue. My best friend Ellen took off work to help me move out that day so that David wouldn’t come home to anyone. She let me stay at her place for a three weeks while I got myself together and found a place. The thing about David that stung me the most was that he never called. After I saw the magazines, he didn’t call my mother to try to get in touch. He just went about with his life as if I had never entered it. I would have appreciated an apology. Obviously I spoke with a receptionist over the phone at his office and canceled my next teeth cleaning appointment. My new dentist is a fifty-two year old woman.

She hopes that David is “a keeper”
Does she live with David? Does she visit England with him and meet his relatives? Does she meet his dad? Is he still in the US or is he in England again? Why does she breakup with David?
-he wants (and expects) her to be a housewife like his mom, she wants to work
-he wants to move back to England, she has a dream job that she can’t possibly keep if she leaves the US
-he is a drug dealer and she didn’t know it
-his dad wants him to marry someone rich, he goes along with it
-he’s gay and just realized it (maybe she finds gay porn somewhere in his house?)
-he wants lots of kids and she doesn’t want any, or if so maybe just one
-he surprises her by saying that he has already been married 3 times, even though he is still so young (after all, if they’re going to be living together that says sthg)
-he dies tragically (but that’s too harsh, I don’t like that ending)
-he cheats (but that’s what Gary did, it’s way too repetitive)
-his dad dies and he goes insane
-she becomes pregnant with his child. He then abandons her and moves away without telling her he is moving. She gets an abortion? …no, no, no this is getting crazy…
-he loses his job and deteriorates into a man that she no longer loves—she cannot see the man she moved in with any longer


sometime - 2004-12-20


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