backyard crowing



i stayed up all night again. i wonder what i'll do this beautiful easter morning. last year i rolled my car windows down and blasted the killers.

i like john mayer because when you listen to his songs, you can tell he makes an effort to write meaningful, from-the-heart, clever lyrics.

i really, really liked colin. more than i thought, because i keep thinking about him. he said i reminded him of his sister, and i remember him pulling my feet while saying something (i have forgotten now what) to me while sitting on my bed. he was so fun and flirtatious and natural...and he didn't have bs to breakthrough, he was very much himself. and he wasn't afraid to show anger or sadness. i saw him furious, i saw him jealous, and i saw him even in tears. i only knew him for two weekends in my whole life, but he made a big impression. i remember elyse saying he liked skinny girls, that everyone he had dated was skinny (including her), and he agreed. i remember when elyse was with joe macking and etc. one morning at joe's place, and they locked him out when he went for a walk. he came to the room, and i let him in. he was pissed, and i don't blame him. he had driven all the way to san antonio from katy to spend the weekend hanging out with elyse and other members of the gang, only to be left stranded when she and joe wanted some alone time. i saw him jealous of joe, and half arguing with him, in front of everyone. i saw him crying after his long-term girlfriend broke up with him over the phone, but that was the night of my first date, the one with chris. i felt bad being so happy when he was sitting there crying. i did try to sympathize, and perhaps my perfecting my hair in the mirror helped him see hope for the future...i don't know. he's older (probably about 23 or 24 by now), but you can hardly tell. he doesn't seem like he's much older. i admire him.

sometimes i can really see myself back at utsa, but i would never admit it. i miss it.

i hope i see elyse again, hopefully this summer. the reason i feel like there is a slight chance i may never see her again is because when i first met her, we went to papasito's, and when i said goodbye, we went to papasito's. it's creepy yet comforting circular storybook endings like that that make me wonder if i'll never see her again...

i hope i see him again, too.

i guess the reason he's on my mind is that a week ago or so he IMed me randomly, and we chatted briefly. he's still working at the bank. he's such a nice kid, that colin is.

robson was cute! why? because i am superstitious too, and his superstitiousness made me feel like less of a little girl.

7:30 am - Sunday, Apr. 16, 2006


lovesounds - futuresex


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