backyard crowing


not caring

on my 'friend' zinnia:

she's sad, she was distressed to the point of tears the other day. no one likes her. everyone talks behind her back, she says. she wants to move to another city.

i want to feel sorry for her, but in truth i'm just as annoyed with her as those people are, and i barely know the girl. she's good at pissing people off, but also quite lovable, if such a thing is possible. i don't 'get' her. i tried to comfort her, to offer some friendly, caring advice, but she wouldn't have it. i never did anything to her, i have been nothing but kind to the girl. how can she be such a bitch and expect to please people? does she really care about her impression, acting how she acts? i know, i'm harsh. i should just stop typing now. no one should care too much about how other people see them, i know i care too much. i'm sure i'm just as bad as her, worse even, but i'm still too annoyed to care.

caring is something i've stopped doing these past few weeks. enough already, this place is really getting to me. i'd much rather be here than houston, though, anything to be away from my parents.

and leila thinks i'm insecure. whatever, i only have two more weeks or so of her.

- Saturday, April. 29, 2006


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