backyard crowing
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the seemingly lifeless lives of professors
i love and hate academics. they obsess over their studies, their papers, their findings. sometimes they forget that there is life outside of their field. their broad, green, barren fields which lead to no one and nowhere--they cherish these patches of land as ordinaries plant their feet temporarily or never in their grasses. the academics try to live off the fruit of their studies, but they're denying themselves life. they take themselves too seriously, they think they'll change the world.
they're cute. they're ignorant. they're passionless about anything but their precious farms. they'll die on those farms, their bodies fertilizing the soil, providing their slice of earth nutrients even in the afterlife.
or maybe i'm just jealous. maybe i just wish i cared about something they way they do.
in other, better news: matt has facebook friended me! but no more.
and cj reminded me that they eat dinner everyday at the cafeteria at half past five! he says i'm welcome to attend. i am now a fan of cj! you rock, dude! it makes me very happy to know that i'm still welcome in the group.
i may see glen for our third date tonight. if we hang out, it will be at ten or so...i'm getting exhausted of all this dating, it's tearing me down. i didn't go to class today at all, nor did i offer any excuses. i dissappeared, which is what i'd like to do...in matt's arms.
but i don't even know how he feels. i hope dearly that none of the posse will see matt this evening if he comes, and that no one saw me with keith, either.
it's lonely at this juncture. i was happier when i woke up at matt and cj's place that morning. i need to call it quits with keith, and probably glen. and if i start dating matt, i'll definitely stop dating glen.
if i start dating matt, i don't want to date anyone else. i'm sick of the dating site crap. it's been a good run, i suppose. no real winners, but i'm still glad i participated. :)
7:19 pm - Wednesday, Feb. 20, 2008
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