backyard crowing



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week of self discovery

So I guess I’m pretty annoyed with abbie at the moment. She suggested we go out for manicures and eyebrow waxing, and so I suggested we stay in for that stuff and just do it ourselves because I’m low on cash. Then she says, “Yeah, but then we have to actually buy the product, like the nail file, and the polish, and the trimmers.” Well, you can do a stupid manicure without that stuff, and no, it won’t look as nice, but it will do.

And at one point she said, “Too bad you can’t go out with Matt to sixth street tomorrow.” Well babe, I was planning on inviting him, so put that in your mouth and chew it. I think she was in a bad mood tonight, but you know what? I don’t feel like making excuses for her. I feel like I’ve done a hell of a lot of that lately, and I’m tired of it.

She supposes I’ll go with my teenie and rick to 6th, but I see them everyday. They invade my house.

Well, not really, but his presence can get a bit annoying sometimes. He just talks so damn loud! I really hope my next roommate doesn’t have a boy who’s always over. It’s not that I dislike rick—he’s great—it’s just that he’s over ALL THE TIME. I suppose I could talk to her about it, but the semester’s nearing completion and she’s moving out at the end of it, so why bother?

I just hope she doesn’t start thinking we’re going to pay the entire rent check if she doesn’t find a replacement roommie, ‘cause trust me, that ain’t happening.

And why does she seem to have no girl friends? She is a mutant, I swear. Her one friend was a jerk. She looked at my bike and was like, “That’s a cute biiiiiike…” And I’m thinking, “thank you very much, now don’t steal it or tell me what kind of a lock to use on it.”

That and the annoyingness of my bff. I mean seriously, I have bills to pay that I can’t even afford! What’s so bad about cooking ourselves dinner? Is she uncomfortable because she can’t cook? Because cooking will take the attention away from her for a few minutes? Because for once I’ll be the expert at something? Because she just likes to be served? Because I can’t listen well while I cook?

She’s not paying for the $25 parking ticket she caused me, so she can just slow her roll and lay low tomorrow. I spend money with her every weekend, she needs to chill.

I said near the end of the conversation, “So, wait, are you not going to sixth street tomorrow?” And of course she said no, her toe was still black and blue. So the whole “too bad you can’t go with Matt tomorrow” is complete bull shit. At least I rubbed in her toe, that serves as a nice little revenge.

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i had a couple of very strange dreams.

in one, my ex patch had come back to haunt me. he was trying to threaten me. he would come through the window...but only with his head, heh. it was quite scary, if i remember right.

the other one is lost on me at the moment. dangit, why didn't i write this down earlier?!

my sleep pattern has improved enormously since i stopped taking the wellbutrin. i'll be on it again in another 2 weeks or so, i suspect.

but come on, 9-10 hours of sleep every night? it's awesome. all except for the fact that my eyes are still blue underneath. i think this has been going on about 4-5 nights now. that medication really did make me hyper...but i liked it, i was productive. i should have made my appointment when i was supposed to, then i wouldn't have this time w/o it. but i'm grateful as well, i'm quite sure my body needs this sleep.

in early november i have a week that goes like this:

tuesday - therapist (tears, tears, tears...but they're the good, relieving kind)

wednesday - ADD test with some chick who uses inkblots? forreal? is she kidding me?

thursday - appointment with the psychiatrist, who'll give me more uppers

friday - academic advisor ("help! zomg! i'm failing/flailing again!)

so, it will be a week of SELF-DISCOVERY. hurrah!

it's oct. 30 -- halloween is tommorow! crap, i have to pay that stupid parking ticket. craaaaaaaap.

abbie and i were supposed to go 6th streeting on halloween and we even bought costumes...i just bought accesories to be a goth hottie, but still...why do i spend so much? *beats head in*

CRAP I HAVE TO SIGN UP FOR CLASSES! FUCK! FUCK! FUCK!

also,

matt #2 is showing some interest in me. he invited me to join his final project group. my "intohimness" is increasing as he is a funny, blunt guy. wish i had asked him for coffee after the group meeting.

- thursday, oct. 30, 2008
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