backyard crowing


eeyore's b-day

still wondering what ben was doing here last night.

news you can use:

-i went to eeyore's birthday with the roommie

-saw knightley, topaz's bff, and promptly avoided her (more info on topaz's relationship w/me later, it's still boggling my mind)

-starting to think the roommie is a close friend, but of a different sort

-i need to call several people so that they don't think i'm a bum bff/granddaughter/daughter/future roommie

-smoked pot a few times...first at home w/roommie, then at eeyore's b-day with strangers, then w/the roommie's friends at their apartment, then again with the roommie at home. now my shit is green, i hope this doesn't last.

-got a good look at the roommie's pot once she went to sleep. i'm surprised it's so tiny. each little leaf is the size of my littlest toe's toenail, or smaller. they're ever so cute. free from her ex-boyfriend, we're not sure why.

-i bought us drink tickets, and we each had a "fireman's four," a texas beer. when i asked her if a fireman's four was a combo of 4 liquors she said yes, so it was pretty funny when i came back with beers. i guess she either didn't know or wasn't listening to me, and i'm afraid it's the latter. oh, well. i actually liked the fours, much sweeter than other beers.

-missed marley fest. roommie brought my attention to the fact that 4/20, marleyfest, and eeyore's birthday are all within two weeks. because three pot holidays in a two-week period is what keeps austin weird.

the roommie and i had our personalities come out to play again this afternoon at eeyore's b-day. all she wanted was pot brownies (and she even got me to ask a couple of people for them,) and all i wanted was to walk around and chill with interesting people, enjoy the journey. this is my life, i've discovered. one big adventure, or journey. i don't care much about the results, or the career, just as long as i've lived and lived well, done good and received good, and written about it all along. the roommie is one who wants to help people and move up in the ranks career-wise. now that i can see the difference, i can appreciate it.

i came out to her, sort of--told her that the reason i was avoiding knightley was because she was the best friend of topaz, "a girl who has a crush on me, and I'm not sure if I have a crush on her back." she said, "oh," and that was the end of the conversation. she's never been too great with respecting gays. i remember at the movie theater she made fun of a flamboyant, high-voiced guy who served as a ticket taker.

saw knightley twice: once on a blanket, and once watching a girl's boobs get painted. the roommie really wanted to see it get done, and i was hesitant--i don't think i would particularly want people watching me if i was having that done! still, they walk around with the paint on, so if they didn't want to be noticed, they wouldn't do it.

the girl having hers painted was looking up flirtatiously at the guy while he did it. pretty erotic actually, for the few seconds i felt brave enough to watch. their eyes were locked on each other, she had her hands behind her head, and she would just smile up at him. my gosh, must have felt great! i want to do that someday. probably in the privacy of my own home though, with a boyfriend. it's so much harder to be turned on by a guy you've just met. dirty talk is such the thing to turn me on sometimes, and you can't just call someone names if it's your first encounter with them, they might get offended and run away.

i secretly laugh when guys refer to themselves as "daddy." abbie hates it, says it's disgusting, and also hates it when they say things like "mamacita" to her, because she's no mom, and she doesn't want them thinking she's their mom. reasonable, no doubt. but when i hear "daddy" and "babygirl" in a sexual context, i am definitely NOT thinking about my own dad. it's not roleplaying, not for me anyway. it's just names that indicate domination and submission.

and it's amusing to hear single guys in their early 20s refer to themselves as "daddy" just because i think it indicates that they are either a) not meant for the young scene, and they actually would work better as fathers than partiers OR b) into the daddy/babygirl name calling fetish/habit. it's amazing, the things that come out of people's mouths. and they don't even know that they're revealing so much about themselves.

6:12 am - Sunday, Apr. 26, 2009


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