backyard crowing


no inherent meaning

I have no idea how to live. How do you deal with that, as a parent? There's rarely one good answer to a question.

How do you cope with wanting people to like you? That seems to be the main issue, these days. I don't like people, because I can't get around worrying what they think of me.

I'm so much more myself when I'm alone, and better.

Even people I would theoretically connect with make me nervous. Even my own family.

Social anxiety is a bitch.

It's particular people who I want to like me, I've noticed. And when they don't, it's frustrating. Maybe because I'm trying so hard -- at everything in life. So rejection is like a failing a quiz. But who said these people were so important?

I did! I made them important, for whatever damn reason! Maybe they're good students, or entertaining speakers, or have unique quirks that complement mine.

WE assign meaning to people. They do not have any inherent meaning.

6:42 pm - Thursday, Feb. 26, 2015


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