backyard crowing


dreamer - you know you are a dreamer!

Last night I had a strangely calm nightmare, and a few nights ago I had a very pleasant dream.

Last night:

I was on a city bus in ATX, and there was an Asian driver. There was another Asian guy sitting just one seat ahead of me, who was a terrorist. The terrorist stood up, and announced to us all that he had a gun, and that after all our stops were reached, he would "escort" the driver elsewhere.

It was a tense dream, but odd, because the perpetrator did not understand the concept of smart phones. I was sitting right behind him, and started texting an emergency hotline: our location, our likely next stop, bus number, a description of the terrorist. I began to notice that we weren't heading towards our stops at all, and we weren't stopping.

At one point, a couple of passengers slipped out of the bus' back door and started running. I was tempted to follow, but did not, as I was afraid of getting shot. Then I woke up.

Here's the potential meaning of the bus:

"To dream that you are riding a bus implies that you are going along with the crowd. You are lacking originality and control over where your life is taking."

And the bus driver:

"To see a bus driver in your dream indicates leadership in some group idea or plan. It is symbolic of collective power. Alternatively, it suggests that you are going around in circles and showing little progress."

The meaning of seeing Asians in-dream, which was clearly written by an American awash in American media:

"To see an Asian person in your dream represents an aspect of your own self that is unknown to you. Additionally, to see an elderly Asian person represents tradition, wisdom and knowledge."

And emergency, a la your dream world:

"To dream of an emergency indicates that there is a urgent matter that needs your immediate attention. You are about to learn an important lesson."

Yep. The job search, the intense desire to move.

For the wonderful dream, a few nights ago:

I dreamed I lived in a house directly across the street from my favorite improv theater in ATX. I had a dog, and I spent more time at the theater than I did at home. It was brilliant!

If that's not a signal to get back to improv, I don't know what is. Spent my last bit of money on healthy groceries yesterday though, so where are my priorities, really? Food over theater. I just don't like to scrounge, I guess. I can't drink beer for dinner like R can. Then again, what if I do go to improv, and it's not the community it once was? What if I don't fit in like I did before?

In the good dream, I lived with R, and we were infact in ATX, but I was happy. I know quite well that community is a large chunk of what I'm missing, and community is in improv.

Still, I need to move. This city, this state, this region of the world? I've never had an affection for it, and always craved to live elsewhere.

I can't wait to uproot myself. I'm unsure of whether I can wait a year. If I wait a year, and then move, will I have wasted another year? Because he might not come with me. Then we would try long-distance, and I would hope he eventually came to live with me. But what then? Where would he work?

11:54 am - Wednesday, Jun. 29, 2016


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