backyard crowing


boos and besties

It's a strange thing when you see two people who you thought got along amazingly break up.

This is the scenario with Tracie and Derek, we'll call them. They have been together at least 7 years, and I met them about 7 years ago, when they were already moved in together.

I remember Tracie once telling me, "I finally decided love was about being with your best friend."

And it resonated with me...and I immediately felt a little guilty. I had broken up with a guy who was my best friend, in part because I wasn't attracted to him.

But I had figured out that I didn't want a sexless marriage, so I'm okay with that. And I'm glad I'm not with someone I don't want to bang today.

She mostly had the right idea, though. It's sad to think of her today, mourning her best friend.

I had a friend in elementary school, same situation -- no one ever believed her parents would break up, they were PERFECT. But he was gay. And it ended.

I don't want to assume R and I will never part. Such assumptions lead people to take each other for granted.

Recently I've taken to calling R "my best friend." It's only occasionally.

And I never did that before. In fact, I was vehemently against my partner being my best friend.

The truth is, people come in all sorts of relationship configurations. Sometimes your boo is your bestie, sometimes they're not. And there's nothing wrong with that.

There's no wrong way to do it.

2:25 am - Saturday, Dec. 31, 2016


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