backyard crowing


diary anniversary

i could really go for a martini right about now.

you know this is my diary anniversary! woot.

mom's not home yet and it's 11 p.m. she hasn't called me to let me know where she is, but this is infact an act of revenge! my act of revenge right back is that i'm not calling her. if i don't call her, she'll understand that i don't give a crap about her. it's a lovely little tactic; i know.

the thing is, i hurt her a lot worse this way.

11:00 pm - thursday, Dec. 27, 2007


motel musings on censorship

stuck in a motel with dad.

it's a good motel, though, and it comes recommended by my grandparents. the candlelight.

i just wish i could figure out how to get internet in here.

i'm falling asleep. i love you. goodnight.


I never understood why some take one glance at a movie or a book, and because of one part--one devastating, selfish, hanus action that a character takes--they suddenly hate the piece of art and do not want to be exposed to it...or do not want anyone to be exposed to it.

I've found why I so heartily disagree with censors and movie ratings.

Like life, a story teems with unpredictability and emotion, unexplainable, reasonless actions that sear through our brains daily, which we never speak about. Some of us must go to these pieces of art out of a desperate longing to be "got." We cannot live without these people, who are ourselves.

After all, we are all crazy in our unique ways. Something's wrong with everyone, including you and me and that chick who doles out the news every night on TV. Even she's screwed up.

So to look at a book or a movie and say, "That's no good, I'm not watching it because she's cheating on him" or, "The guy kills himself in this novel, so I'm not reading it," is the same as ignoring human suffering in life. They represent us, these characters. They're pinpricks, and some of us deny our own bleeding.

And some of us cry in the theater.

We all have a journey, so we should let our characters have adventures, too. Without them we are not whole.


"You're the only man alive that I love."

-The Good Girl

11:56 p.m. - saturday, Dec. 22, 2007


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