backyard crowing


They see a yes.

It's high time to get clarity. In another dimension, at the end of this class we'd all get punk'd and the cameras would come in and the audience would laugh at how the students were manipulated into following like lemmings such an asshole of a mouthbreather.

(My professor, that is.)

I immediately deleted his email because I'm not going to dwell on it. Not here, not ever. Enough with the damn tears, that class has been over for five days.

I keep saying to myself things like, "He has no idea the damage he causes." But I've turned it around -- he knows exactly what he's doing. And he's fine with it, happy with it, wants to see us fail. High on power - he's tweaked in the head.

The only thing I can imagine that gives me compassion for him is the idea that as a child, he was beaten and/or verbally abused. I don't see a way a normal upbringing could turn him out as hateful as he is.

Stay in this long enough, and I'll get there. I will go to the unrequired post-class social, and I will be early, and I will be pleasant, for networking's sake. That's a survivor. It's what we do.


I've been thinking on the phrase "Leap, and the net will appear," thanks to one wise dangerspouse, blogger extraordinaire. :)

I came to a point where I thought - it's not true, sometimes you leap, and there is no net. Sometimes you will fall and get hurt, and then get back up again.

But you can't live thinking that way. If you're always worried about falling on your face, you'll never leap. And so, optimism once again wins the war. Every time.

Even when optimism "loses," it wins. Have you ever seen an optimist lose? It's impossible. Even a so called "loss" is a learning experience, an opportunity to grow. And they just won't quit, because they don't see a "no" within themselves.

They see a yes.

5:58 am - Monday, Dec. 07, 2015


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